We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
she just threw a smoke bomb in an elevator and ran down 9 flights of stairs to see it at the bottom.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I decided taking Molly and seeing Birdman seemed like a wise life choice.
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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