you drank 3/4s of your half gallon of vodka, made a fort out of the kitchen table, and actaually had sex in in it.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
He woke me up, handed me a ringing phone and said break up w her for me. That hung over.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
I just remembered that I totally burped into someones mouth when we were making out. I was really smooth about it so he didn't notice.
Randomize
