wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
she genuinely believed that kangaroos are a cross between a deer and a T-rex
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
Randomize
