We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
I just made deviled eggs for everyone not passed out. Im officially becoming a drunk chef.
I fought off a bull with my bare hands while he went off to have sex with her against a wall. I’m more upset about the fact that no one is acknowledging what I did.
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