let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'm driving up the street and can't tell if my ears are actually about to pop or not.
A solid 8.5 on the baked meter, I need to stop.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Laying on a pile of just out of the dryer clothes because this is NOT real life.
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
Randomize
