Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Can you stop being a bitch and just take some Kaluha shots with me bro?!?
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
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