but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
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