Lets go to the mall and pick up some fat chicks and take them out tonight so we can be the skinny friends
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Family of uber douches all wearing ed hardy in a hummer taking up 2 parking spots at starbucks. Please be more cliche
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
Sneezing cum all over the table was not the highlight of the family reunion if that tells you anything
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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