it wasn't lemon gatorade
After they won there was a guy outside Magee Hospital yelling "name your kid Sidney"... that guy may or may not have been me.
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
part of me always dies a little when i go to the "2 women seeking 1 man" section in craigslist's casual encounters to find nothing there. it's tragic
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
I do have a life. It just consists of making scarves and chesse straws now
OMG. Hung over at my grandparents house. Threw up on 3 T-stops, countless snowbanks, and the grandparents driveway. Was proposed to last night. Bruised from head to toe from falling down 3 flights of stairs. Debating my intelligence because it seems that "happy new years" is too hard for me to spell. How were your new years festivities?
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
Randomize