I'm a big fan of 2 things right now: 1) Gatorade and 2) the fetal position
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
