who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
He tried to brush a hair off my cheek, but turns out it was just a freakishly long chin hair. So no, we didn't bang.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
