38 yer olds are good kisserssss
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
a creepy fucking ass man came up and started raven cawwing in my ear... he said it was the raven mating call. i am officially freaked out
Watching water boil has never been so amazing. I love wake-and-bakes.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
did you just send me my own nude
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
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