so then you didnt wanna fuck tonight right?
oops, you werent supposed to get that until you left.
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
Nothing says "get your life together" better than waking up in a tub full of your own vomit. Twice. In one night.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
