spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Randomize