do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
It took me 6months to figure out that he only had one testicle.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
And let me tell you, getting your ass waxed is the weirdest fucking experience.
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
whose shirt was i wearing?
his little sister's
what was she wearing
a feather boa and 6 inch heels
Actually I really wish that I was drinking so I could ask him for breakup sex and then later blame it on my alcoholic tendencies. Maybe tomorrow instead.
Randomize
