If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
We pay for beer, you give birth. It's how the world works.
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
See, not all bad decisions involve my penis.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
I just found the gloves and lightbulb I stole. Did you pee on a ATM inside a bank?
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
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