I kissed a girl and did not like it. Now I hate Katy Perry even more.
I can't go out tonight. I feel like I'm starting to party as much as Farrah on Teen Mom.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
a kid who worked there came up to me and let me know you were sitting in the bathroom sink. he said it was fine, so i just kept checking on you.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told the joker that my vagina is the bat cave and he needs to infiltrate it.
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Im eating leftover Easter ham in a bubble bath. What has my life come to?
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Whats a little breast milk between friends?
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