Sex tip #67: Jizz in the eye is very near the equivalent to pepper spray. Not recommended for pleasure enhancement.
I left my Thanksgiving family dinner puking in my hands from the worst hangover in the world
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
Went to a wedding reception last night, came home with a Christmas tree and the rest of the keg
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why were you not born a dude?
Because god wanted to level the playing field
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
Randomize