Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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It makes me really sad that some people start their saturdays running or biking instead of with 3 shots of tequila, a sausage biscuit, freaks & geeks and 2 orgasms.
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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