you know you are hungover when... you set your alarm for the next time you think you are going to throw up
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
His drunk text included an attempt at quoting a Nyquil bottle in MLA format
One is full of apple juice. One is full of tequila. This is real russian roulette my friend.
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
I feel like there should be a 'roommate information section' of the paperwork when there's a chance you'll be given pain killers.
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
yeah the highlight of my day was the 911 operator telling me they had frantically been trying to figure out where i was
Stop letting me drink while doing my makeup. I think I used sharpie for eyeliner.
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize
