Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Sincerely would love to tap that, on a mountain with the wind blowing on your pubes .
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
Back. Waiting on Thong the shuttle bus driver. THONG
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
Randomize
