You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
Wow, you know I need to stop drinking alone when I pour my drink into my hand and offer it to my dog,
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
his mom walked in, looked at me, sighed n nsaid 'when are u gonna learn' n walked out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Dude, jerking off when you're all hopped up on pre workout energy supplements has got to be the greatest thing I've ever done.
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Easy Mac and you are the sexiest things in my life
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
IT'S A GIANT FUCKING ROBOT, DUDE. LOGIC IS OUT OF THE QUESTION BECAUSE AWESOME.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
He fucks strippers and doesn’t have a life plan. Of course I’m going to regret this
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