Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
this girl ate taco bell on my bed naked last night, it was the sexiest thing ive ever seen
so you had a one ended conversation with the toilet las night in between barfs. you kept telling the toilet how strong it was because its gone through a lot of shit in its life.
drunk me is so punny.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
AND I HAVE A NICE COCK! A STRIPPER TOLD ME SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
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