Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
I'm going to force her to break up with me this week. Tonight I plan to shit the bed. If that doesn't work I'm not sure what's next.
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
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