I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
Wow so 15 missed calls, a vm AND a text saying come downstairs? ...And where is downstairs? Explain.
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
You just sat there and yelled "I JUST WANT TO RUB MY NIPPLES"
Oh shut up man. Once the police get involved its every man for themself.
Always wear a seatbelt when giving road head. I think I'm just going to tell people I don't remember how I got the fat lip.
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
This is NOT the time to take our hits and go to Disney. Let me repeat that. NOT THE TIME FOR DISNEY ON ACID
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
All i hear is "BITCH BETTER HAVE MY HONEY" and i turn around and there is a dude in a bear costume. It was fur real.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Randomize
