dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I know im too high when i think porn has an interesting story line.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I fell asleep after the worst sex of my life and now I'm snowed in with him. SEND HELP. CALL FEMA. GET ME OUT OF HERE.
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
I learned tonight while in another country that no matter the nationality, men are disappointing in bed
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
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