Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
He's telling me stories about how he made out with a 14 yr old when he was 22. I'm going home.
My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
What I'm trying to say is, that time you chained me to my dresser and made me beg for it was incredibly romantic.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I think you're my mermaid sister. Separated at birth, by sea.
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Randomize
