he just found out the funeral is this morning so i'm wearing last night's clothes and look like a total slut.
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
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HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
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My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
My apartment looks like the apocalypse of sobriety.
Earlier today I was eating cookie dough from a tube, now I'm laying naked next to a hot guy watching Pawn Stars in between orgasms. You really can have it all.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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