So tired and we had a cokehead in the salon today making us bleach her whole head because she thought it would let her pass her drug test for custody of her kid
Oh.My.God.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize