Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
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