hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Pretty sure my dad just walked in on me jerking off watching guys on webcam. Remember how I used to say "most awkward day of my life?" I'm retiring that phrase.
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I took shots of absinthe with my mom just now. Except awful things.
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
