If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Thanks for convincing the hot dog guy to give me one for $1 after I drunkenly dropped the first one. I loved your reasoning "I know you mark that shit up! I work in retail!"
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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