this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
Is it weird that I want to have sex wearing my glasses and lab coat while having an actual scientific discussion?
I think I have a bro crush.. When I imagine him, I imagine him waking up to go take a shower and just finding three bitches making out waiting for him. Like that awesome.
Im pretty sure I didnt bang him becasue I woke up at 6am to him jerking off with a fleshlight right next to me in bed ... He made himself cum and was moaning my name ... MOST AKWARD EXPIERENCE OF MY LIFE
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
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