It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Of course I was flustered, I had a lot of penis in my face.
I don't think we should have started that trash fire
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I really want some funfetti cake but I feel like its more socially acceptable to go out and drink
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
You know I've done a lot of messed up stuff. But I never thought I would have to put a bandaid on my dick. Yet here we are.
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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