...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
If you could smell my eyes you'd understand the whole story
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
You know I love you. I just don't love your penis.
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
She was a little thick, but we banged on the beach and fireworks went off as we finished so I think God wanted it
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
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