U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
I wanna get FUCKED up and fail the piss test at my eval so they send me to detox and give me suboxone... Is that bad?
I woke up laying in alphagetti with the message "I'd go get checked asap" written out in the letters.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
its a vaginal recession for me, ill take what i can get
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
Just listened to a full Christian rock song, loved it,listened to the dj send a prayer to a 4th grader who was having a tough year and realized I'm high as fuk
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
We sexted for four hours straight. Is this really what my life has come to?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
Randomize