u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
it was the least impressive dick i've ever seen... and i've changed babies' diapers.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Wake and baked to watch the boston marathon. God I love massachusetts
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
The chlamydia really affected his face.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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