i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I sobered up in the middle of it, that I was hooking up with him in a rosemary bush. I woke up smelling like a pasta dish
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I found her in my pantry with her shirt off twerking...I tapped her on the shoulder and she said she was giving Chef Boyardee a show and to give her a minute...
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
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