I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
i'm just going to get a pitcher of margarita. sober up by 10. and then do my accounting project
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
I woke up with the Dorothy costume at my ankles, both sparkly red shoes on, and clutching ToTo....we're not in Kansas anymore, dude
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Still dying that you shit outside
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
Randomize
