I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
SHE JUST SHOVED MY HAND DOWN HER PANTS AT THE BAR
Don't text me with that hand
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
Randomize
