i wonder why nobody wants to date me...im doing a crossword at work and asked out loud: whats a 4 letter word for 'a reason to get married?'
i was like PREG?
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Just saw a couple do like 5 Sakai bombs and my dad goes "who says love is dead"
just once I'd like to not pass out before we leave the designated pre-drinking place
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
Not sure if buying Twisted Teas for the alcoholics posted up outside the gas station counts as paying it forward but I am optimistic.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
So is he the one who got away?
They all got away. I’m a catch and release kind of girl.
Just come here quick. I'm home in 3min. It will take you literally less than 5 to walk. Then 2 to undress, 16 to fuck, 2 to dress again and 5 to walk back..!!
exactly 16 eh??
Randomize
