Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
just so you know... i was wasted last night, but the evening is coming back to me in flashes... i made you eat gravy last night, didn't i?
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
Randomize
