How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
