It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Trustme, don't ever look up when you're giving road head. It's awkward.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Realistically you can't tell me you're gonna put mashed potatoes on your dick and expect me not to get excited
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
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