woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
i crushed up some extenze and put them in his protein powder - should make for an interesting gym experience
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
Just had a dream about an abnormally large bottle of tequila. No more depressed drinking for me.
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
I just mistook cooking oil for the whiskey that was also on the counter... They're the same colour. That was not a good shot... I need to not drink alone.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Client visitor days are the worst. If I have to wear a tie and can be hungover at least have the decency to find some more attractive visitors
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
One three hour marathon fuck session and now she's divorcing her husband. Should I get business cards made?
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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