I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
she sent me a picture of dilf asleep in bed with the caption "what happened last night?"
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
I called 911 when they kicked me out of the bar last night.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Fuck me I smell like cheese
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize
