so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
We convinced him to snort an altoid. We should not be allowed to drink together
You're like the curious george of whores
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
You were typing for me while I was hyperventilating into a paper bag on the floor.
He was wearing running shoes tho. Thats like the cardinal rule. You don't fuck a guy who wears running shoes as regular shoes.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
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