If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
We got to his house at 7am and two random guys were on the couch shot gunning beers saying we were late for the party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I just tried to pass the bowl to my dog for 2 minutes before I remembered she isn't human. It is 7:27 am.
Randomize