we made out on top of his cat.
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
She told me she was selfish for not giving me a blowjob... I couldn't agree more.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
as you might have guessed from my lack of texts, the herpes have calmed down.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
I swear, when I turn 21 in four months, I'm going to carry a flask around with me, and make a drinking game out of everything.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I think there is cocaine on my toothbrush.
Randomize
