By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
These 29 Nasty People Went To The Bathroom In Public
I think I'm going to postpone my photo shoot until my Gpa dies. I don't want to be in lingerie and stripper heels when I finally get the call
I dont care how drunk you were. Making a bet with MY husband at MY wedding that you could seal the deal before he could is ALWAYS inappropriate!
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
I may quit my job to go be a costumed Jedi at Disneyland.
19 People Who Had An Inappropriate Celebrity Encounter
I'm getting a car wash man. I am go get a car wash high.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
The taste of regret at 8am, yup that taste is Jack Daniel's