i'm signing you up for texting rehab
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
I will seriously deflate and melt into the floor into a puddle of devestation, shame and vodka.
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
Found a girl that was gonna make out with 25 people for her 25th birthday. I was like #12. Made top half!
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
Send help, water and tortillas.
But I do cardio so I don't get winded during sex really it's not like I'm trying to lose weight
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.