when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently i was cut off before i even walked in
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
When I went to pick up Adam from the train station, I found him passed out, covered in gold paint and wrapped in a red blanket. someone had glued a gaudy green rhinestone to his forehead. He looked homeless.
Responsible things to do when you're too hungover to get out of bed: Breast self exam.
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
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