im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
My halloween constume SCREAMS "Hey i just got done with a shitty relationship and I'm DTF"
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Is it a bad thing that I'm trimming my nose hairs in anticipation for the 8ball to be delivered?
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
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