No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
The fact that I found him in his Ninja Turtles t-shirt next to six empty and obviously consumed packs of EasyMac watching reruns of Becker certainly made telling him that I wanted a divorce so much easier than I had planned.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
When a bartender remarks "wow" on how quickly you've finished a drink... Is that good or bad?
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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